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Kii

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Some reflection on 2011 [31 Dec 2011|09:22pm]
This year has been the most influential year of my life. I think I’ve done more of importance than I ever have in a single year. At the start I wasn’t happy, I didn’t know what I wanted but it wasn’t what I had at the time. I was stuck in a job that harvested my soul regardless of how great the other staff were and stuck at uni for only two hours a week but enough to keep me in place. I wasn’t going anywhere and for the first time in my life I didn’t like it.

I had a plan when I was 17, get a science job, get married, house, 2 kids and a dog. Over the subsequent years this has been hacked at, revised and abandoned. I didn’t want the kids anymore, not quite sure on the married either and science and I had a falling out. Dogs are still cool though.

The point being, this is the year I have taken the most risks. Risks for my own benefit instead of just being happy wherever I was and waiting for things to happen. I quit my job, moved cities, left some friends, broke some hearts not all of which I’m proud of but sometimes you have to make sacrifices for your own happiness. Unfortunately, you can’t always do what you need without hurting others. I also made a start on my tattoo collection.

I was getting there, things were picking up and I took my last university exam, then something pretty massive happened. Very suddenly, my Mother died.

I could never say to another ‘I understand’ about this. You can’t. There is no way you can ever understand how someone else feels when they’ve lost their mother, even if you’ve felt the loss of your own because everyone is different and everyone’s mum is different. I felt bad about it but I was so sick of ‘I’m Sorry’, I was angry at the false ‘If you need anything, call me’ when half the time I never knew who the person saying it was. But in the end anger is part of loss. It was hard, the most difficult thing I have ever done was hold my Mum’s hand whilst she died but I did it.

I guess I could have gone into a deep depression and lived in a hole until I felt better again but I never would have come out of it. I am my Mother’s Daughter and we don’t take any shit. I went to therapy and started doing things that I really wanted to do with my life. I started my own business, it was a little rocky when I wasn’t sure what to do with it but I’m getting there now and it’s going to be great. I started living for myself, it can be a little fiddly when I drop into old habits but it’s good.

It sounds terrible to say that the year I lost my Mum is the happiest I’ve ever been. It’s not because she died, it’s because she made me really live my life instead of existing through it. I know now that things will always get better because I’ve lived through something that I thought would end my entire world. I could never imagine what life would be like after losing her but here it is. The world didn’t just stop because I thought it would and now I want to use these days to do what I love and enjoy.

The plan is scrapped, I’ll do whatever feels right. I love my job, my house, my boys, our piggies and I’ve got great friends. I wish all of you the best for 2012, enjoy yourself, do whatever the fuck you want regardless of what others will think or say and stay safe and happy.

xxx
rock on, don't stop

New Blog post! Discharged from Therapy [21 Oct 2011|07:07pm]
[ mood | calm ]

http://kittenstitch.blogspot.com/2011/10/discharged-from-therapy.html

1 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

New Blog Post: I'll never win. But that's ok. [30 Sep 2011|09:29pm]
[ mood | calm ]

New blog post!

http://kittenstitch.blogspot.com/2011/09/ill-never-win-but-thats-ok.html

1 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Games for sale! [06 Sep 2011|09:46pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]

Having a clear out! All prices not including P+P

DS Games:
Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days Plus Strategy Guide and Art Sleeve £15
Final Fantasy Fables: Chocobo Tales £5 Sold
Final Fantasy III £8
Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: Ring of Fates £6

360 Games:
The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion £12
Fable II £5
Eternal Sonata £6 Sold
Bioshock 2 £5
Blue Dragon £5
Prince of Persia Plus Collectors Edition Strategy Guide £12
Dynasty Warriors Gundam 2 £10

rock on, don't stop

New Blog post, new blog and new pets! NEW EVERYTHING! [06 Sep 2011|09:00pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]

New blog post about OMGPOSITIVE!

http://kittenstitch.blogspot.com/2011/09/day-to-day-positive-note.html

Also new blog entirely about Piggies!! :D

http://piggieoverlords.blogspot.com/

rock on, don't stop

New Blog Post! Mum's birthday [03 Sep 2011|12:34am]
[ mood | busy ]

This post also contains Guinea Pig squee

http://kittenstitch.blogspot.com/2011/09/day-to-day-mums-birthday.html

rock on, don't stop

New Blog Post! Weekend update of performance and realisations [24 Aug 2011|11:06pm]
New blog post! http://kittenstitch.blogspot.com/2011/08/day-to-day-weekend-update-of.html

Enjoys. It's slight verbal poopsies but I'm sure you're used to me being like that now.
rock on, don't stop

New Blog Post! Ups and Downs and Medication Weirdness [17 Aug 2011|04:51pm]
[ mood | tired ]

http://kittenstitch.blogspot.com/2011/08/day-to-day-ups-and-downs-and-medication.html

Also bought myself these fabulous things. Poncho and New glasses! I did need new lenses so it wasn't completely unnecessary :P

Photobucket

1 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

New Blog post! Insomnia Diary 01 [14 Aug 2011|04:09am]
[ mood | awake ]

Yes it's 4am. I warn you insomnia posts are rambled because I just write and don't think about what I'm writing, it's the best way to do the no sleep ones!

http://kittenstitch.blogspot.com/2011/08/insomnia-diary-01.html

Enjoy the crazy.

rock on, don't stop

New blog post! Therapy: Self Help Info [12 Aug 2011|01:24pm]
[ mood | contemplative ]

New post! http://kittenstitch.blogspot.com/2011/08/therapy-self-help-info.html

Also features a Day-to-day update

rock on, don't stop

New blog post! Therapy: First Phone Session [10 Aug 2011|01:10pm]
[ mood | calm ]

New post!
http://kittenstitch.blogspot.com/2011/08/therapy-first-phone-session.html

Complete with fabulous video!

1 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Nomcon (Will Break You) [08 Aug 2011|01:19pm]
[ mood | content ]

Nomcon was pretty fun, it was a very fast feeling con which is nice. Sometimes when you're in the dealers room things can really drag out. Made a bit of money and had some fun! I got to do a Burlesque act again, though we had to keep it PG so we just trolled poor Keith instead. Grabbing him on stage and basically lapdancing to a Hey Big Spender Dub Step remix with him stuck on a chair between Tab and myself. We had a laugh :D A big thank you to our Copping on the inside Claire, for making sure Keith was actually there. Giblets and myself also got to troll MasakoX in a guest panel, he has some very strange views on titties and anime. The voice actress for Ash Ketchum made a fantastic point on weak portrayal of women in anime scripting but the audience didn't quite get it.

We met a Balloon guy in the dealers room, he did proper sculptures and things and they were fabulous, got to hang out with Genki, Gilbets and Alice from Destiny Blue a lot more which is cool. The flight back was a bit poo, there were storms over Bournemouth so we couldn't land on the first attempt and we had some weird ass feeling turbulance which wasn't fun. But we got home and watched some Ouran High School Host Club and went to bed.

Now I'm back home, taking a day off before starting on more stock and cosplay for Ayacon. Keith needs Tab for some video stuff over the next week or so. I shall accompany him and whilst the mens are workings Claire and I shall play with Copics and Promarkers and do colouring in. Mmmmmm Feminism.

In other news, new blog post for all my brain junk over the weekend! http://kittenstitch.blogspot.com/2011/08/day-to-day-weekend-update.html

rock on, don't stop

New Blog post! Day to day [04 Aug 2011|04:06pm]
[ mood | exhausted ]

Here ya go!

http://kittenstitch.blogspot.com/2011/08/day-to-day-low-motivation.html

rock on, don't stop

New Blog Post! Medication: First Dose [04 Aug 2011|11:57am]
[ mood | tired ]

New blog post!

http://kittenstitch.blogspot.com/2011/08/medication-first-dose.html

rock on, don't stop

New blog post! [03 Aug 2011|05:49pm]
[ mood | calm ]

Blogger seems to be having some issues over following and commenting so I'll post here everytime I do a new post. This will be at least once a day, unless I'm away so be prepared for that!

http://kittenstitch.blogspot.com/2011/08/tattoo-second.html

Here's the new post :) Feel free to comment here if you wish to or on blogger if it'll let you.

rock on, don't stop

Okidokes, here it is [02 Aug 2011|02:35pm]
[ mood | Bloggerific ]

Right, I decided I would start the blog.

Here's the link for you guys: http://kittenstitch.blogspot.com/

Feel free to follow or comment on anything, pass on to anyone or just keeping things to yourself.

I be an open internet book.

4 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Considering making a blog [02 Aug 2011|12:06pm]
[ mood | anxious ]

Lately I've been going through a bit. As many of you know, my Mother died in June and this has brought a lot of issues to light that I've always had but never noticed. I've considered making a blog of some kind since I started writing insomnia diaries to figure out why I couldn't sleep. Then last night Tab showed me a great one called I do not have an eating disorder, written by a woman dealing with anorexia that she never realised she had, which has solidified the idea for me. I highly recommend it even if you don't have eating disorder issues in your life.(http://misspixnmix.tumblr.com/post/3232725607/i-do-not-have-an-eating-disorder-p01-ive-been)

I want to do this for myself really, I don't believe anything like if I write about things then mental health issues will become less taboo topics blah blah. Though I feel that updating in the middle of con updates etc wont work.

Any opinion, oh mighty friends list? Or should I just carry on here.

3 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Manchester MCM Expo [31 Jul 2011|12:47pm]
[ mood | pleased ]

Manchester was yesterday and you know what? It was pretty good. They're most definitely running again but the humble dealer opinion is that they should expand the hall and keep it to one day. Then if they still fill the thing, expand to a full weekend. Timber and I were manning and womanning the stall (Timber doing the womaning obviously), Tab and Matt are still down at ALCL in London, and we had a good time. Event was so easy to get to with the free bus going from the station to nearly outside. Getting dealers passes and setting up was really easy. Everything ran on time so keep it up Manchester! Lets see if you can be more organised than London as your numbers get bigger.

Made monies! Was the first time selling my tentacle stock, it was a little slow to sell but I made a bit of money and some money for Cancer research with my Cancer bow tenties.

Photobucket

It's definitely worth going back when they run again. Now I just need to make sure I have stock for Nom and Aya where it will hopefully sell even more!

1 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Store is now live! [21 Jul 2011|06:17pm]
[ mood | accomplished ]

More items to go up once the inking is finished, please message me for orders or use the etsy stuffs. I also do custom sculpts and colours. For contact either use the store link below or email Kii@khaoskostumes.com

Go visit! :D
Kii Kuriosities

rock on, don't stop

Stock is being completed!! [21 Jul 2011|12:15pm]
[ mood | accomplished ]

Here's a preview photo of one of my stock pieces debuting at Manchester MCM

Photobucket

Sculpted and then treated after baking with inks and varnish. Extremely limited edition as I have to wait for a pocket watch to break to use the case. It took approximately two hours to complete and retails at £30.

I'm open for custom orders, designs or colours. Feel free to contact me here or email Kii@khaoskostumes.com

Now I just hope they'll sell :D

2 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

LFCC [11 Jul 2011|04:39pm]
[ mood | drained ]

So I'm back from LFCC, tired but it was a good con. It's horribly disorganised but when you give up and organise yourselves it's a lot more fun. Matt and I were there ahead of Tab and apparently our dealer's table was booked under the 'anime' bit which Mike Towers was in charge of. (I know, I shuddered too). But asking LFCC where our table was I was directed to a map, which someone had moved, and nobody knew where it was moved to. So I spoke to a guy who pointed me to another who called another person and told me to go back to the first desk I was at to speak to someone who'll have the full dealer's list. When said person arrived they didn't have Tab or Khaos down on the list at all even though Tab was doing three talks for them on one of their stages over the weekend. When I explained this staff just became more and more rude towards me like it was my fault we weren't down on their dealers list. I was passed off to an 'Are you under Mike?' not explaining who Mike was or what that meant and I didn't know so I just had to leave.

I went to their 'Animuuu' section and asked for Towers since figuring who they must have meant but nobody knew where he was or anything to do with tables. There were no empty ones there anyway. I went back to where we were squatting next to Geoff (http://www.fetishman.co.uk/) and sent Matt over to the Anime section to find what was going on since I'd ceased to be displomatic. Trading had started by this point so I had a little set up on top of our suitcase, Matt came back, still no more info but with his mind set on getting us a table. We became...

Table Pirates

There were lots of unclaimed and unlabelled tables in the comics section next to us so Matt grabbed one. Then we wanted more space so got another. We stuck them onto the end of Geoff's table and voila!! We were traders again!

Other than the utter farce of setting up the con was pretty good. Very slow the start of saturday presumably because of the rush to get tickets for signings and photoshoots but we ended up with good money. What I don't understand is why we had to do it all in the first place, surely if someone is there dishing out dealer's tables that isn't you, you would still make a record of it.

But anyway, now I'm just waiting for an order to come in so I can make more stock but thankfully we have the weekend off this week!

6 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Slowly becoming a machine. One plastic piece at a time. [05 Jul 2011|11:56am]
[ mood | Slightly violated ]

So Arcadecon was alright. It was pretty slow but it was slow for everyone trading. Seems it's just too close to Nomcon for anyone to spend money which is a shame but people were nice. The fun was in hanging with the other UK dealers that had come over like Steve, Gurinder, Genki and Sonia and the fact there was a Lush table :D We had a bath in the hotel room so we totally got a bubble bar and had a bubble bath.

We got back Sunday and yesterday I went to the Sexual Health Clinic to change my contraception. I figured I'd get the Mirena coil as I'm not allowed anything with Oestrogen anymore and had to come off my pill. The doctor I had didn't like the idea of fitting one in someone who hasn't had a child but this is what I was recommended so it's what I was getting. However, minus the undignified positioning, there's a fair bit of pain. Now, I have a pretty good pain threshold, tattoo and previous medical investigation methods etc so I dealt with it for a bit. But then it went even beyond me and quite frankly it wasn't worth it when there are other methods available. I think the doctor refrained from an 'I told you so' but it solidified the fact that if that hurt so bad then like hell is there ever going to be a kid coming out of there.

Anyways, so now I have the implant and I'll see how this one goes. Apparently it has a very high chance of stopping your periods which I want killed with all the travelling I do nowadays. It's a small plastic thing stuck into my arm, but I've still got the bandage on so I can't poke it and freak Tab and Matt out just yet.

Step one of becoming a plastic transforming dinosaur is now completed.

3 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Norway! [29 Jun 2011|12:35pm]
[ mood | accomplished ]

Norway was pretty cool! Was nice to have a break and the people over there are pretty sweet. I took very few photos which will end up in a pitiful facebook album at some point. Highlights being the GIGANTIC glass of 7Up Tab had where he immediately demanded a photo of me holding it and Maximus Shorty, the named Hostel Bonzai tree. We made good money but now means we have no stock for Ireland. So instead of doing this I should be making more jewellery however, it now means I am really giving this self employed thing a shot. Albeit with a fair bit of help from Tab.

So now I have these bad boys!
Photobucket

Ta daaaaa. I shall take photos or pretty things when I make them, or you know you could buy them and see them that way, that would be cool.

Anyhoos, I'm going to get back to stinking the upstairs out with Epoxy resin.

rock on, don't stop

Busy everything was busy! [13 Apr 2011|11:37am]
[ mood | busy ]

I wont do a massive write up of everything that's going on because it would be massively long and also I'd be super procrastinating from packing. Like a smaller update totally isn't. Shut up.

- March was busy and I did a lot
- Dropped all cosplay plans due to the awfulness that was Feb
- Still needed to do Marvel hero
- Decided on Thor
- Funsize Thor was born! Hilarity ensued.
- Video of minami skit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c8o-IKzilAU

- Handed my notice in at my job and sorted my moving date. Whee!
- Mum had emergency hip replacement but doing well!
- Went to another Burlesque Rocks with Tab, Dan and Jen.
- Decided final Kita routine
- Kitacon and my birthday!!
- Was spoiled rotten with presents at the con including two anime girlies and a matrix of leadership
- Talked to Pez and Storme a lot more. They be cool.
- Stayed in a Hilton for my birthday. Aaaw yeeaaah.
- Kita's got talent! Was nerve wrecking but fun.

- Did my first ever burlesque performance. Video here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r9dtZusMhmU
- Had some great comments but the internet seems to be where the disgruntled speak loudest. I've even had 'friends' say shit to people presumably not expecting them to tell me but oh well. I've not taken any comments to heart, it's taken me over 20 years to like my body and it's nobody's business what I do with it. You didn't see anything you haven't already seen of me at the Keller anyways and I really enjoyed myself.
- Comments that made me laugh "I would be so ashamed if that was my daughter"
I told my mum everything about it. She loves it.
"She doesn't even look 15" I'm 22 you idiot
"Inappropriate for under-aged con goers" There was nobody underage. You can fuck at 16 and you see unclothed boobs in a 15 age film. There was nothing on show they legally weren't allowed to see.
- My performance has been sent to a professional burlesque act to see about more shows :)

-Now in the last week of my job and training my replacement
- Got my tattoo!!!
- Started packing and move to Southampton in a week :) here's hoping for a better job market!

21 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

It's March!! [01 Mar 2011|01:00am]
[ mood | determined ]

It's now March!! February was pretty shit tbh so we're starting new with March.

This will be a much better month! Even if it's just by comparison!!!

GO POSITIVITY!!!

4 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Pam [08 Feb 2011|07:08pm]
On Thursday I made it so Soton Central to meet up with Tab and Matt to travel to the SFX weekender and I got a phone call from my mum. My Aunt Pam who had helped raise me from when I was 10 weeks old died that morning. It wasn't unexpected, she was very ill and had been given a do not resuscitate order by her immediate family because it was getting to the point where it was cruel to keep forcing her to fight.

Needless to say I'm still devastated. She was a woman who was jolly and loved life, one of those people that was just built to look after children even if they weren't her own. Remembering is painful but I know it will get better and the happy memories wont have the sharp pang of hurt forever. I'm glad she could stop fighting so hard because mentally she was all still there but her motor functions had failed her. It must have been unbelievably frustrating.

I guess I'm writing this so that if I'm off or upset over the next two weeks or so I wont have to explain all the time. I didn't want to write on my facebook or twitter because I feel that cheapens things a little and I don't want to accidentally inform someone who doesn't know yet because that would be an awful way to find out. But also to sort my own thoughts out because I'm feeling pretty lost at the minute. I've never lost someone so dear to me before and she was such an important person in my life. I want to figure out what I can do to best honour her memory but I think that should wait until I can stop crying about it.

The world lost a wonderful person in Pam. I just hope that everyone else can have the pleasure of having someone like her in their lives.
7 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

So close... [25 Jan 2011|06:33pm]
BAH. Thought I had it there for a min. Now back to feeling all over the place again. Back to the drawing board!

Go go Gadget Kii!
rock on, don't stop

I'm sorry, I forgot we're in the 1940s. [16 Jan 2011|02:41pm]
[ mood | infuriated ]

This actually disgusts me. I heard about this potential law in my Controversial Science lectures but this is fucking bullshit.

The Kentucky state Senate passed a law yesterday mandating that women seeking an abortion must wait 24 hours before the procedure is performed, and also must be shown an ultrasound of the fetus.
(http://thinkprogress.org/2011/01/07/kentucky-abortion/)

It's this line that really gets to me: Cases of rape or incest are not exempted from this requirement.

The cruelty of some people just so they can feel 'moral' astounds me. How many women are now going to seek abortions which may endanger them? Go to another state to get one so they don't have to be guilted and feel like a murderer? How many unloved and resented children will be born will be born because the guilt tripping got to their mother? It's not fair on a child to be brought into a world where it isn't wanted. And how DARE they ask a raped women to look at the embryo formed from a man that abused her. GUILTING her when she's already gone through so much!?

If she chooses to avert her eyes, the “doctor still would have to describe to her the image.”

I'm so fucking angry right now.

6 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Been working on myself a lot lately [14 Jan 2011|05:57pm]
[ mood | accomplished ]

Things I have so far done to self improve:

Started writing a lot of things down
Bought more furniture
Got myself a bike helmet
Re-written my CV and signed up to one of two Science recruitment services
Started planning some big changes
EDIT: Travelling to my tattoo consultation tomorrow

This list will get longer.

Thanks to everyone that replied to my lack of sleep post. I think it may be more mental than physical as my mum suffers from the same thing when stressed but I'll still give all your suggestions a go :)

rock on, don't stop

I'd really like a good night's sleep [11 Jan 2011|10:59am]
[ mood | tired ]

I always seem to be sleeping terribly lately. Waking up a lot and feeling tired still when I wake up. I used to sleep fine in my bed so it's not the mattress and the problem still persisted when I went home for Christmas (though that could have been the airbed's fault).

Does anyone have any suggestions?

4 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

My Uncle needs to be shot in the face [04 Jan 2011|07:33pm]
[ mood | angry ]

Ok, my aunt is in hospital. She's got breast cancer and luckily it's been dealt with quickly and she's having surgery for removal and reconstruction all at once. Now to me this doesn't seem like much, she'll probably have follow up radiotherapy at most and compared to the shit my mother went through it's not very much at all. However, I do understand that when a family has been unaffected before it can seem like a huge deal and even though the situation isn't life threatening when the word cancer is used people can't help but think of death. Sure my cousin is annoying me to NO end by moaning on her facebook about it all, even though she's a bystander and it's actually her mother that needs the support I spoke to my mum and found out this little gem.

My Uncle wont let her go visit her mother in hospital until she's done all the ironing and has sorted her room out.

ARE YOU FUCKING SHITTING ME?!?!

It's not a fucking privilege to go visit your mother in hospital, you need it. Frankly my aunt needs it. It's not fair to keep visitors from her when she's probably feeling most shit. I'm quite enraged that she's being used as a bargaining chip, sure you need to get your quite frankly lazy ass ungrateful daughter to do her shit before she goes back to uni but this isn't the way. He's meant to be army trained for fuck's sake you're meant to be able to deal with shit.

2 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

[25 Dec 2010|02:43pm]

So I'm sitting here at home, in my mother's blue snuggie, black woollen dress and black tights with pink fishnets. I look well cool. It's so nice to be home, I really needed the break and I'm already relaxed :) so now mum is on the phone, Lee is playing some football sounding thing and I'm watching the colour of magic waiting to be called to do the spuds.

It's the first year that I've been far more concerned with making it a good time for my mum and coming back has really shown me that I need to look after myself more. Feels pretty good.

Anyway I'm rambling now so I best let you all get back to your stupid amounts of food :) also I've been back two days and already terribly scouse again. Beware any phone calls.

Merry Christmas all! :D

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.

rock on, don't stop

You can be a Prince too [21 Dec 2010|07:23pm]
[ mood | contemplative ]

I started following the Trans Post Secret project on Tumblr (http://transpoststatement.tumblr.com/), I've found it really interesting as people post about whatever they want, what their gender means to them, their partner's gender, anything to do with sexuality.

Then I came across something that actually quite upset me. It was this statement.

"I hate that I can never be her Prince Charming because this Prince has Princess parts."

I couldn't help but think, if she can't see you as Prince Charming you need a new Princess.

3 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Lantern Love [18 Nov 2010|12:58pm]
[ mood | bouncy ]



*spazzes* So far I'm stupidly happy with this (not completely just because Ryan Reynolds is a pretty man)judging from the trailer they've thought enough to lay down the characters that are essential for later lantern stories like Abin Sur and Sinestro. Also there's Kilowog but I just loves him :D

In other news! I'm heading to Auchi this weekend! I'm hoping the 6 and a half hour journey shall be hilarious, we have a portable dvd player, we'll be fiiiiiiine....

2 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Ok done now [09 Nov 2010|05:10pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]

Emo post was blaaaargh.

Cheered myself up, accompanied Mandy to get a piercing and also got one myself. Hurrah!

Also feeling much better! Massive thank yous to poor Luke who worked my shift for me and saved me from inevitable death by karaoke and Tab and Matt for copious tea, soup and comics.

2 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Hating job right now. [06 Nov 2010|04:45pm]
[ mood | sick ]

Really not happy with my job atm. Our website states that we're open for the entire Christmas period excpet for 24th/25th and Jan 1st. This hasn't been discussed with the staff but now it looks like I'm not going to get to home which means I haven't been back to Liverpool in over a year.

I feel like I'm constantly working because my two days off aren't next to each other and the job is both creatively and intellectually unstimulating. There's also too few staff, there's the general manager, myself the assistant manager and two waiting staff. Now my manager has booked this weekend off, I'm ill but I'm still trying to do two 12 hour shifts. However, last night and this morning I took a turn for the worse to the point I'm legally not allowed to be around food preparation. Knowing I have a kids party that needs pizza I try and contact my manager to sort cover, he hasn't answered me for 5 hours now. I can't get hold of any of the old staff that could cover me so now I'm stuck here and poor Luke has come down with me to do all the food work.

I really question why I'm here sometimes, but then I think it's pointless to try and get a new job now when I'm so close to getting my degree and being able to apply for the jobs I truely want. I don't want to be a bar manager all my life. I want to stop working nights and odd hours, so many of my friends now work 9-5 and I'm missing a lot. I've had to reply to SO many events the past week with 'Sorry, I'm working'.

*sigh* Illness is making this all seem worse I know but I'm getting fed up with it all atm. Fucking hate emo posts >.

4 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Quick 'before I die' update [02 Nov 2010|07:01pm]
[ mood | sick ]

Expo has possibly killed me but I had a good time. Although I'm now ill and fucking knackered (general public are infectious! eeeeeeew) I really enjoyed working on the stall for Tab and Matt the entire weekend.

Monday we went to Camden, I bought pretty things whilst the two men were forced to come shoe shopping but now I have giant red space shoes that are amazings. And then we got ice cream.

Got home at 11.30pm, saw Luke, gave Luke his expo present and his cosplay fever book and frantically hid his birthday present from him. He gave me my Fable III which he kept hold of for me. Slept. Got up for uni and made it to the 9.30am bus. Now I'm in work and sniffling into the laptop whilst having to clean the place for the dreaded boss visit on Thursday. Man I need sleep.

But all is ok. For I have giant red space shoes.

4 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Quick update! [29 Sep 2010|05:05pm]
Almost a month without an update, back into old habits again! Well life's a little different now. I've had to go back to uni and do another module to get the degree I want instead of graduating in November. This was money I really wasn't expecting to spend so unfortunately I had to drop my big Gimli cosplay for expo. Thankfully Tab was kind enough to design me a new Steampunk character to cheer me up :) so now 'Nurse Botty' will appear at Expo alongside Roxie Parts.

Initially I was annoyed about having to go back to uni again and emoed over it a lot. But now I'm there I did kind of miss it. It's odd that my first day back and I already feel more a part of a social group than I ever did in my third year. Spent most of the first day with the anime soc boys, before my lecture, one of them is even in my class and then in the bar after eating and drawing baby Cthulhus. I could get used to this.
1 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Now I will attempt never to update about my boyfriend again. [31 Aug 2010|09:07pm]
[ mood | happy ]

I rarely talk about Luke on here partly because he's a very private person and partly because I don't want to be one of those girls who is updating about just how much she LOVES HER MAN 4EVAS AND MISS HIM WHEN HE'S BEEN GONE FOR 20 MINS. Sorry, minifacebook rant there.

The point of this I guess is I read the first Vol of Scott Pilgrim yesterday, found it pretty interesting and thought seeing the film may be good. Luke then text me asking me to go see it that night. Boyfriend Levels up!

I really enjoyed it! Some of the game references went over my head but it didn't feel like I was missing anything which I always regard highly in a film. Someone described it to me as 'good comedy disguised as romance' which I think is pretty apt. I'm also in love with Wallace and now say Lesbian far more than I probably should. This brings me to this:

Kiichan says:
OH bring soundtrack? ^^;
Solitary Angel - Mr Sympathy says:
what sound track
Kiichan says:
The scott pilgrim one
Solitary Angel - Mr Sympathy says:
oh you mean the one im currently burning onto disc for you ^_^
Kiichan says:
I lesbian you so hard


It's the little things you know?

3 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Random and late Amecon update of random and lateness [20 Aug 2010|03:00pm]
[ mood | geeky ]

So yeah! I hit the ground running after Ame was done so it's only now I've been able to stop and write up a feedback thingy.

ThursdayCollapse )

FridayCollapse )

SaturdayCollapse )

SundayCollapse )

Mike won best muscles! wheeeee!
Tab won best armour! Wheeeeee!
Karen won Euro place No2! Wheeeeee!

Well done to all of you, I know such fucking talented people it makes me a wee bit sick sometimes.
Read more...Collapse )
MondayCollapse )

All in all, a very good con. I seemed to be running around doing everything and nothing at the same time. It did make me realise that I really enjoy being involved in the running of things, such as helping on Tab's stall and sorting people out and what not. It's probably overspill from being in charge of the anime soc for so long. NEED... TO... ORGANISE... PEOPLE... so hopefully I'll be taking a more active role in things :3 I sense more gophering in my future!

SO NEXT! Is EXPO! I'm going for the long haul and bringing Gimli with me!

Oh yeah also had my exam but that's not as fun so I'll post about that laters.

2 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

[17 Aug 2010|11:34am]
Back from Ame

Very Tired

Awesome weekend

Now need to learn Cancer

Exam tomorrow

Update later
2 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Why? [30 Jul 2010|04:15pm]
Why do I do this? I'll save on buying a wig and use my hair for my cosplay at Ame! Short and blonde works! yay!

No... I have TERRIBLE roots atm. But if I dye it now by hair will grow too much and I'll have roots for ame ¬_¬ damn you devious hair you. I could dye it twice but that's like handing a death sentence to my folicles.

Good news, my resit exam is the Wednesday after ame! A little close but not too bad! After that I shall celebrate by lopping all my hair off again and putting stupid colours in it. YAY.

Also we now have internet in the flat. YAY

Luke left for Japan. BOO

Can still talk to him on msn though and he says he's already brought me presents. YAY
4 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Quick update! [19 Jul 2010|04:49pm]
[ mood | content ]

Just a quick update to let you all know I'm still alive!
Living in the new flat now! Net should be up on the 29th (5 to 10 days my ass) have paid for my ame membership so definitely going now!! :D Mandy, text me and let me know how you want me to pay you for accom.

Updates will be sparce but I do get net in work. Tab and Liz tend to keep me up to date with all the cool internet shit going down anyways :P

COSPLAY! Roxie debuted at clubnight! She needs some tweaking before Ame but pretty much done! Disney Alice is looking promising at the minute and Persona 3 cosplay is a go go! I'm bringing Hawkeye with me too as the boys are bringing their FMA uniforms again.

Also I have dinosaur fabric, it will be curtains when I'm done with it! WOOO!

rock on, don't stop

Banes of an assistant manager [25 Jun 2010|02:01pm]
[ mood | angry ]

Tomorrow is meant to be my day off... LIES. A stupidly early text message from my boss states that he wont be able to get back to work til Tuesday. The girl who is the self proclaimed 'Duty Manager' even though that position DOESN'T EXIST has bailed on me, not only getting me to cover her shift on Tuesday as I had no choice because she decided she wasn't working it, she's now left a note that she is 'unavailable for any more shifts' The only other person who could have covered is a mate of mine that used to work for us but he's back home and away from Bristol atm.

Tonight is my fourth day in a row working 3 til close. Close in our place is at least midnight and on a friday and saturday, 2am. By the end of this week I'll have worked 47 hours. I'm meant to be moving house, going to ikea and watching Doctor Who tomorrow. Now it looks like I'm going to be in work. AGAIN.

The next person who says they wont cover a shift for me the next time I want a day off will possibly get skinned.

4 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Aw Shit... [24 Jun 2010|03:41pm]
[ mood | depressed ]

Two posts from me in as many days, oh you lucky F-Listers you.

Well, today has started on quite a downer. I got my final exam result, I'd passed all the others including the one I felt terrible about and was waiting on this one. It was the first exam, the one I'd worked my ass off preparing for. I failed it. Now, I've failed an exam before and the last one was my fault, I'd focused too much on the next exam I had and therefore didn't give me all into it. Hence I resat it after last Aya. This one however, has left me feeling cheated. I prepared so much for it but I still didn't achieve a passing grade. I found myself thinking, how is this fair? According to facebook a number of my coursemates are in the same boat. Everyone seems to be thinking... wait, what?

This isn't the thing I'm most upset about. Now I might not be able to go to Japan in the summer like I was intending to. It all depends on when my exam is, I could buy one way flight home earlier than everyone else but I just don't have the money to do that. So I've come to the decision that if my exam gets in the way I just can't go. It's utterly devastating but at least I can put some of my saved money into the new house and can finally get my tattoo. I've warned Luke that if he ends up going without me I'll be inked by the time he comes back.

So I've set up my 'not going to Japan' plan and I'm thinking that it's going to happen atm unless I'm gloriously proved wrong by my cunt of a university. I'd rather be pleasantly surprised than disappointed again. This is a bit of a pointless update really but I'm getting myself in order and cheered up after Luke brought me muffins and a wispa. He's a clever boy really.

I'm in work again, so at least I have a partner, job and somewhere to live. It's not the end of the world but it's a bit shite. Here's me thinking I've left uni behind me! Arses.

6 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

My views on the world cup [23 Jun 2010|07:23pm]
Usually when the world cup rolls around I just ignore it, vaguely know what's going on and that's the end of it. However, since working in the bar trade I've learnt to dispise big match nights and the like purely because of the drinking yob attitude it encourages. I leave work at 3am some nights and see the tail end of it all, it's just a mess.

People fighting, having drunk far past their standard tolerance and barely able to function. Mind that I also live in the centre, so I'm subjected to people randomly yelling whilst walking past my window and hooting those FUCKING HORNS. I never realised I was a light sleeper until moving to Bristol (admittedly this was more discovered via loud flatmates). But I've never witnessed anything cause this kind of chaos other than football, not politics, not Wimbledon or any other 'national' events that people are suddenly patriotic for.

Now, this was managable as it didn't happen very often but thanks to the world cup it can be two or three times a week regardless of whether it's England actually playing or not. I'm sick of it already and glad to be moving out of the centre, even though I'll still be working here.

Yes, enjoy the football. Just don't fucking piss and puke on my doorstep whilst doing it.
4 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Putting my life into little boxes [17 Jun 2010|08:09pm]
[ mood | amused ]

So here I am, designing shit in my book whilst by boyfriend packs up my belonging into boxes. He's getting annoyed at how slow I do it so insisted on doing it himself... who am I to complain?... although now he's making all my plushies sound like 1930s Mobsters... o_O

So yes, packing. I'm going to be moving house in the next few weeks, I don't know exactly when yet but it's going to be so nice to only have to share a place with one person instead of the five people I've had to co-operate with for three years. New place is lovely :3 Andy and I have yet to flip the blessed coin that decides who gets the big room. I was hoping for the 'I share my bed with more people therefore I should have the bigger room" option but alas...

Random update times: Job going quite well! I haven't cocked up yet or been overwhelmed which is a good sign. It's my first time running a weekend shift as a manager on Saturday so I'll see how it goes after that!

So yes, I'm going to continue to watch Luke pile too many books into one box to lift, pile half of them out again and fill the rest up with plushies. Kick it, and decide it's still too heavy. I could get used to this 'Doing this to annoy you' stuff.

3 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Money! [08 Jun 2010|05:03pm]
[ mood | bouncy ]

I'm on a month's trial on the Assistant Manager job! Wooooo!!!

Now to be a good employee! *flees internet*

9 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Moaning it's not fair... [07 Jun 2010|02:12pm]
[ mood | Disgruntled ]

... is something I'd really like to do right now. We got our dissertation report marks back today and quite frankly I'm not pleased. I didn't do badly by any means but the mark doesn't reflect in my mind the amount of work I've put in.

That's the thing that really confuses me about university marking sometimes, you can do everything that they ask of you but somehow you didn't do it enough so that they can take over 40% away from you. I worked for months on my dissertation, I was on it around the clock for the last month before hand in. Practically doing nothing other than writing it out, working, attending lectures and running society. I've asked for a breakdown of the marking from my tutor just to be able to get my head around it. It's MY work from MY labwork so how can I do it incorrectly when all the work was mine to begin with?!

Anyhoos, I'm still waiting on promotion news and I'm in work at 3pm so I've just been raging on Soul Calibur IV, mocking Tab everytime I beat down Seigfried. Needless to say it's cheering me up.

1 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

Didn't want to go anyway... [03 Jun 2010|01:22pm]
[ mood | satisfied ]

Apparently there was an 'end of exams' celebration that I was not privvy too. Even my flatmate had gone... I've realised that I've stopped actually caring about it anymore. Yeah, it's always a bit disappointing, especially when I get the vibes of 'you're no fun because you don't go out and get pissed' or 'you're boring because you stay in a lot' or the hilarious one of 'but you're never here'

But you know what? I have hobbies that I love, I go to an RP game at the comic shop once a week, see my friends, go to conventions and do awesome shit. I have a JOB and a possibility of a promotion, an amazing boyfriend and some fucking awesome friends that don't require me to be drinking to spend time with them.

So fuck you. My life is better.

6 rocked my world - rock on, don't stop

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